The Proverbs 31 Woman

The Woman of Wisdom - the Proverbs 31 Woman

At the end of the book of Proverbs we find a character sketch of a woman… she’s a good woman, she’s a wife, she’s a mother. Through her we are given a short summary of the practical wisdom presented in the book of Proverbs interpreted in the setting of a happy home.

In biblical thought, true wisdom is pictured by contentment with diligent work in a safe, peaceful, structured family setting…. We must actively teach this Godly wisdom to our children. We must do this in word and in deed.

In a world that tells them “its not enough”, we must tell them, and show them “this is the way”.

https://ucgraleigh.blogspot.com/2022/08/the-proverbs-31-woman.html

2 Caveats

1) Some of what God says about family is commanded, but some of it is practical advice so that you might find contentment in life. Be sure you make the distinction.

2) The scriptures are careful to instruct that to remain single before God is good and honorable. It carries with it a different set of priorities. I am not here to discuss this scenario.

Family Life: The Complete Image of God

Genesis 1:26-28 God made human beings in His own likeness. Lets make a syllogism:

1) Male and female we are in the image of God 

2) A man is not a woman, and a woman is not a man.

3) So, there must then be certain aspects of the likeness of God found in the created nature of women that are not in men. On the flip side, men embody certain characteristics of God not built into women.

Genesis 2:18 - the Hebrew word construction here means "matching him"... "like him but at the same time opposite to"... "complimentary to him" etc.  But the spiritual reality comes out in the context as well... without her  the male was incomplete. Note: logically the opposite is true as well… without him she is incomplete [God is also your helper]. 

Proverbs 31:10-12 this same thought is found at the end of the bible’s great book of wisdom, Proverbs… and the woman he really needs is the woman of wisdom.

But before looking at the woman of Proverbs 31 let’s briefly consider how the book of Proverb begins!

Proverbs Begins With a Woman

Proverbs 1:1-4 we are told that the primary target audience of Proverbs is those who are young and naive. We are told these instructions will be practical [dealing with daily problems even occupational skills]… they will give intellectual understanding… they will provides moral instruction in self control, self discipline, fairness, justice.

Proverbs 1:5-6 This wisdom also has good stuff to offer those who are already wise: addressing the mysteries of life, parables, riddles, etc.

The wisdom found in this book is personified as a woman calling out to all people to meet her, Proverbs 1:20-23, Proverbs 8:1-11, Proverbs 9:1-6.

She is not meant to be understood as a "real person" she's a poetic device... but the choice of analogy is significant. Wisdom will find he fulfillment in the woman of Proverbs 31 who is dedicated to building a strong home and family.

Wisdom raises her voice in the public places, the noisy streets where business and commerce are done, the city gates where people come to discuss civic affairs. Meaning wisdom is accessible, she is readily available, eager for students.

Deuteronomy 30:11-16 the wisdom of God is not beyond comprehension… it is not hidden away in some secret place accessible only to people with expensive university degrees… we can get at it, if we are willing to listen. 

Wisdom is a Choice

Along the way, Proverbs considers alternatives to the wife of noble character: 1) we are warned about the adulteress in chapters 5-7  2) then we briefly meet the quarrelsome woman. Both of them can break up and destroy the contentment and peace of the family.

The son of Proverbs has to make a choice... does he want: 

l excitement, drama, intrigue, novelty, experimentation [and all the psychological trauma and damage that the goes along with it]... or

l contentment with diligent work in a safe, peaceful, structured family setting… which is Godly wisdom… and leads down the path to eternal life

Daughters also must choose. Will she be the wife of noble character? Will she be the quarrelsome woman? Will she be the sexually provocative, promiscuous woman?

Seeking the wisdom of family life through good choices is Godly wisdom we must teach our children!

The Wife of Noble Character

The book of Proverbs comes full circle. In the beginning, the young man must seek the imaginary woman [who personifies wisdom] to have a fulfilling life. But in the end, he needs a good wife to actually achieve that good life... and he needs to choose wisely. Because she will set the tone of his home, his family, his life.

The woman of Proverbs 31 is idealized but she is meant to be understood as a real person who offers practical "real world' example of wisdom in action. She’s practically perfect in every way… but she’s possible. She’s something  someone could actually aspire to.

Proverbs 31:10-12 The first thing we learn about He can trust her, because she has good sense, she is industrious, she fills their home with good things and good values. Her way of living gives us a nice summary of the wisdom found in the book of Proverbs. I have three points:

1. She Is Industrious

Proverbs 31:13-19 in those days clothing was a form of preserving wealth. People did not live in a money based economy. A persons wealth was not kept in a bank [they had none]... it was deposited in real items like flocks, fields, homes, and in this instance clothing Matthew 6:20.

l So, the spinning and making of clothes was serious and important business. It also took up a great deal of time. She burns the midnight oil working her spinning wheel. But she is eager, and enjoys the work. She is not slack or lazy. Proverbs has much to say about avoiding laziness and enjoying the positive benefits of diligence and application!

l She provides food for her family but provides variety, which is a lot more appealing than eating gruel everyday... but also ensures better nutrition and health. Proverbs also addresses practicing self control with regards to food and drink… avoiding gluttony and eating for health! 

l She sees to it that everyone gets their fair share including her servant girls. Fairness and justice is essential to the wisdom of Proverbs!

l She has a good head for business transactions and shows personal initiative. Good sense in money matters is part of the practical wisdom found in Proverbs… avoiding debt and get rich quick schemes

Her diligent work is directed toward building up the material well-being of her family. God expects much of both men and women. But He has given a special assignment to women to care for the home.

2. She Has A Generous Spirit

Proverbs 31:20-22 generosity towards others is a matter of biblical wisdom that is more about the quality of character rather than the correctness of character. We are told to be generous, but never how much. Its a matter of heart rather than a matter of performance… Quality rather than quantity

Deuteronomy 15:11 elimination of poverty is not part of the biblical agenda for the present age. Trying to eliminate poverty under our present conditions of open rebellion against God means either: 1) elimination of the freedom to choose 2) providing blessings for parties who curse God.

The generosity of the noble wife is more the quality of her thoughts and emotions. She shows compassion, mercy, innate desire to nurture, to protect. Previously we heard she makes clothing... now we learn that the clothes are of the finest quality, the adornments in her home demonstrate personal elegance and worth, 2 Peter 3:3-4.

Proverbs 31:23 in the center of this poem of praise is a reminder of the central point of the poem: this is the sort of woman a man needs to be successful and respected in life... whether you are a banker, a farmer, or a common working man [1 Thessalonians 4:11-12 Godly living creates respect].

Proverbs 31:24-25 her industry and work ethic produce all that is needed and more. The excess production makes it possible for her to express the generosity in her heart... but also allows the family to store up some of their wealth for days that might not be so prosperous. The book of Proverbs advises us multiple time to store up today to weather the possible storms of tomorrow… and so that we can show  generosity towards others!

3. She is a Capable Teacher

Proverbs 31:26-28a she is a good teacher who communicates truth through "words of wisdom" and through her personal example. She puts into practice the instruction found in the book of Proverbs.

Her primary students are her children who, "rise up and call her blessed"... they appreciate and respect her instruction in word and deed Deuteronomy 6:6.

God expects much of both men and women. But He has given a special assignment to women to care for the children.

Proverbs 31:28b29 Her husband respects her as well… perhaps even learning a thing or two himself.

Paul says the unbelieving husband might come to an understanding of the truth through his believing wife. Surely this ability to learn does not "switch off" in cases where both are baptized. This my be true but also must be done with proper respect towards the husband, and in good and Godly order.

Proverbs 31:30 to the son God's word says beauty and charm are not good reasons to marry a girl. They are not wrong, but they are not enough, because they will not last. To the young woman God's word says don't put your confidence in your personal beauty, or charm, because they do not last.

Instead, put your confidence in the gentle and quiet spirit which is of great worth in God's sight.

Conclusion

Godly wisdom is pictured by contentment with diligent work in a safe, peaceful, structured family setting. The woman of Proverbs 31 typifies this practical outlook on human life given to us by God himself. This is wisdom for women and it is wisdom for men.

We must actively teach this Godly wisdom to our children… in word and in deed.

Proverbs 31:31 "Give her the reward she has earned, and let her works bring her praise at the city gates".